The angels held their breath... and my comrade Zoe crashed into the scene with the most insane question, "So, what do you think about KK right now?"
"What do I think about KK????? I DONT think about KK. Why do I need to think about KK? He is so in the past and I am thinking of how to respond to this guy...do I have enough of drama in my life or what?" I grumbled. But I asked back, "What about KK?". She clarified, "as in having a relationship". I exploded inside. "What on earth is wrong with everyone nowadays? This is weirder than the weirdest dream I have ever had." So, to make sure she had not gone crazy, I asked her a few diagnostic questions.
Me: You and me, we are considered partners correct? You, the prince, me the priest, like youve always said.
Zoe: Yea.
Me: You know my heart is gone into the mission field, correct? And you have supported and shared my calling, correct?
Zoe: Yea.
Me: SO HOW ON EARTH WOULD IT MAKE SENSE THAT YOU, OF ALL PEOPLE TO ASK ME TO CONSIDER A RELATIONSHIP WITH KK WHILE YOU KNOW HE IS MARRIED TO HIS CHURCH IN MALAYSIA????????
Zoe: I guess you've made your mind about him permanently which is what I thought so. I just wanted to check that's all.
Me: HUH???????????????????? Get behind me, Satan.
I didnt want to continue the conversation about him. I was very uncomfortable. I was trying to recover from one shock and instead I gained another. It was too much to handle. I lost my sleep that night. Curiosity was killing me. Why did Zoe ask me that, but most importantly why in such a time? Was God behind this? There were too many questions I darent ask Zoe, lest she started to convince me into doing the insane.
So for the next two weeks, she kept wanting to tell me about KK. I kept telling her, I had too many questions. Then she said maybe we should start talking again. Before I agreed to that, KK sent me a request to add him into my msn messenger. That's what good friends are for.
It was actually great talking to KK again. We caught up on the lost years. I storied him on all the troubles of the year before I came to HK, on how I struggled with getting my Masters and how I rebuild the foundation of my relationship with God from scratch after our breakup. And then how it was for me during DTS and FEET and then being a staff on the base. He told me everything that happened to him during the lost years. We talked and talked and talked and talked and talked like never before. We were friends again. We obviously still love each other we just didnt know if we were supposed to get married.
"Gosh, not only Zoe's crazy. I must have gone crazy too" I thought. After two months of talking to kk online, I needed a talk with Nancy, my base director. I told her, things looked like they are going somewhere. I thought they were from God, but still not completely sure about everything. I needed prayers. I told her, we were going to meet each other in person twice at the KLIA in Malaysia during my furlough. [But it got increased to four times because I took a trip down to Jakarta to meet up with Zoe via KLIA.]
The first meeting was awkward for us. He officially asked if he could pursue a romantic relationship with me. I said, that was very hopeful. After that I flew home where my mom, much to my mortification, asked me out of the blue if KK was married. She was surprised to find out he wasnt . On the other hand, I was more surprised that she asked me about him.
Days later I went to see Zoe in Jakarta. Then KK and I already had very progressive conversation in regards to a relationship. I just wanted to ask Zoe for the last time if I should go ahead...based on her judgement as our mutual friend and of my ministry partner and the knowledge of what had happened in our lives since she knew us until then. She couldnt encourage me more. So on the way back from Jakarta, KK and I met again at KLIA. We talked about the possibility of a wedding in November, exactly, a year after.
I dropped the news on my father about my intention to marry KK. He was a lot more than happy. Then, he said, I can be a missionary and go wherever I want as long as I am having a husband. I couldnt believe it was that simple for him. I guessed that was really God.
So I returned from furlough practically engaged.